Indeed. Of all the words in the lexicon, why pick “wonder” as my theme?
At the risk of pedantry, let’s check http://www.dictionary.com
verb (used without object)
1. to think or speculate curiously:
“to wonder about the origin of the solar system.”
2. to be filled with admiration, amazement, or awe; marvel (often followed by at):
“He wondered at her composure in such a crisis.”
3. to doubt:
“I wonder if she’ll really get here.”
verb (used with object)
4. to speculate curiously or be curious about; be curious to know:
“to wonder what happened.”
5. to feel wonder at:
“I wonder that you went.”
6. something strange and surprising; a cause of surprise, astonishment, or admiration:
“That building is a wonder. It is a wonder he declined such an offer.”
7. the emotion excited by what is strange and surprising; a feeling of surprised or puzzled interest, sometimes tinged with admiration:
“He felt wonder at seeing the Grand Canyon.”
8. miraculous deed or event; remarkable phenomenon.
9. for a wonder, as the reverse of what might be expected; surprisingly:
“For a wonder, they worked hard all day.”
This blog is about all of them. Especially #2 “to be filled with admiration, amazement or awe; marvel.” But I will deal with them all, I promise.
But for now, I want to think about being filled with admiration, amazement or awe. On this morning’s commute, I noticed that the trees along the North Saskatchewan River were covered in thick frost, giving the drive the magic of stepping into an untouched, undisturbed crystalline world. For a moment, the mind wants to think about the scene; the pieces that make the sudden picture, the hows, the whats the whys. But there is another impulse. The impulse to let go of thinking. To be. In wonder.
When the conscious part of the mind lets go, there is a moment of unease, of leaping without a net, of flying through space, suspended by nothing. Just you as a consciousness, and wonder. No. In wonder. For as long as you can hold it, wonder holds you.
And that’s the irony of this blog. I have to let go of wonder to write about it. And by writing, I aim to make more space in my life–and if you’re with me–in your life, for greater wonder yet.
We shall see.